10 Interesting things about Office Tech

The center, which I’ve been speaking about for a number of posts now, has taught me a lot of things for as long as I’ve been here. These facts, true or not true, also entail some of my opinions of what’s been happening here.

1.) Always pack your cream face cleanser and your stuffed animals before you arrive at the center before curfew. Curfew is at 11 p.m. East Coast time, so it’s best if you don’t remind your folks at 10:30 at night that you forgot something, even when you just got in the car.

2.) The food is crap and won’t agree with your stomach no matter what. It makes you think about how your taxpayer dollars going to programs and facilities like this one, which is funded by the state of Maryland, and the center’s food and water comes from Baltimore City. So, make sure you vote for an increase in funding to these programs so maybe the center will afford better food. Until then, pack more peanut butter sandwiches and eat more of their salad bar salads.

3.) There are no freezers where you can store Lean Cuisines for dinner, so just bring another peanut butter sandwich.

4.) Arrive five minutes before class starts. This will get you ready for a job or career when you’re done in six months.

5.) Get up with the zombie walk at 7:20 in the morning so you don’t miss breakfast. This will give you enough time to lay in bed for a minute or two before you groggily get dressed and head downstairs for your first cup of tea.

6.) The machine that spits out orange juice is always broken, so pack some orange juice before coming to the center. Also, pack a sandwich.

7.) When typing away at Paradigm Keyboarding, forget the backspace key is there. Hammering away at the key is not going to work, not even when you click your mouse and hit Delete, or use the arrow keys to get your way. It’s not going to work. If you’ve made a mistake, keep typing. If at first you don’t succeed with typing straight and you’ve made at least half a dozen mistakes, go back and repeat the same exercise over again until you get it right. There is no reset button!

8.) Spend as much time in the computer lab as possible to practice your typing on Typing.com or to do your Microsoft Office homework. You will need all the time you can get with this practice when it’s after your 8:30-3:45 six-hour day. Also, get your homework done on Friday when you have all the time in the world before you go home, because you get out early, depending on what week it is. (Most Fridays we get out at 2 p.m., other times we get out at one.)

9.) Make sure you know where your office tech buddy is. No matter what the instructor will say to you, or what the other students in class say to you that gives you the case of the negatives and “I’m a total monster b—-“, your office tech buddy will watch over you and be there for you when you need someone’s shoulder to hug. You will need this in your first week.

And finally, number 10.) Avoid the “interesting” people who randomly walk up to you and start talking to you about things that don’t make sense or don’t apply to you. Chances are, they won’t last long at the center for their rude or “interesting” behaviors later on. Trust me, you don’t want to know their business.

Oh, and don’t forget: pack a sandwich. Or at least buy one from the café before they close at 3 p.m. in case you don’t like what they’re serving at dinner.

When in doubt, buy a sandwich and stick it in your refrigerator. That is, if you have one in your dorm room.

At least tonight’s dinner wasn’t a total waste, because I learned an extra thing about the dining hall: Get there before 5 p.m. because the good food is first come, first serve. I was lucky to make it out with some rockfish with crab and a salad tonight, which practically saved me.

But I always make sure I have a sandwich in my fridge.

Playlist selection- music from the upcoming musical Waitress written by my favorite songstress, Sara Bareilles


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